Dear Kansas City,

Let’s be real: it’s over between us.

It was a hard decision. I may (or may not) have shed a tear in my room by myself. We definitely had some good times. Remember the night we decided we wanted s’mores so we made a bonfire in June? It was so hot my eyeballs were sweating. But those s’mores were really tasty. And there was the time we drove way out south at night just so we could see the stars more clearly.

We had some rough times, too. Remember when I was riding my bike home from work and some guy stuck his head out of his car window and called me a pussy? Not cool.

On a positive note, you really do have the most beautiful seasons. I know you get that all the time, but it’s true! I remember last spring when I was riding my bike all the time. It always had just rained. The trees and leaves and grass and even the sky was a little green. This last winter we got over a foot of snow! It was so much snow I didn’t have to go to work—that really was great of you.

You’re more dynamic than people give you credit for. I mean that physically—you’ve got some killer hills. And mentally—you hang out with a lot of cool people. You’ve got your hipster friends, punk friends, prep friends, artsy friends, and tech friends. I think it’s great that you’re so well-rounded.

So I want you to know that it’s not you—seriously. The reason I’m leaving you is just because you were my first city. And I always knew you wouldn’t be my city forever. I know you’ll find someone who is perfect for you; she’ll show up when you least suspect it 😉

And look, I’m sorry I cheated on you with California last summer. If you ask me I think it was a sign that things were starting to fall apart between us. I promise it meant nothing.


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